Kids paraded around in public on a leash inevitably grow up to murder and dismember people.
Leash Kids and Serial Killers
Studies have shown that as many as 89.4%* of serial killers were leashed as children. With the frequency of kids on leashes rising at an astronomical rate, this is a potentially catastrophic problem that our society will have to face in the future. So the next time you see a kid on a leash, resist the urge to laugh and instead take a picture. Submit to leashkids@gmail.com and help document these individuals that are going to grow up to be serial killers, if they aren't already.
*Best estimate
Monday
Jessica
Jessica can count all the way to four! Why, that's the same number of people who have mysteriously gone missing from her neighborhood over the past month or so!
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